It took one and a half hours to cross the border back into the United States. People were wandering about, chatting and walking to the Duty Free store as cars crept one car length at a time towards the border.

When at last we arrived, we’d all but finished answering the officer’s questions when Spy struck up a conversation with said officer through his window and made his own declaration. Part of it went like this:

“We have bears. But we didn’t buy them in Canada. We got them at the Teddy Bear Factory. My bear’s name is Cupcake because he’s courageous.”

Spydad and Spymom drove away snorting. Isn’t courageous the first thing that comes to mind when you see a white cupcake with pink frosting?

Then again, Spymom had promised to sew Cupcake a rainbow superhero cape when we returned home.

Here’s Cupcake wearing his Colorful Courageous Cape:

Stage 2 of Spy and Q’s vacation had us presenting passports and crossing into Canada…

where Spy and Q were forced to learn a touch of French. Arrete was the first word to be assimilated. Followed by: Bonjour, Merci, and Mouche.

Spy delighted in pointing out: Every. Single. Mouche.

And much to the amazement of Spy and Q (and the amusement of the residents of Montreal and Quebec), Spymom and Spydad exercised their dusty high school French. We expertly managed signs, menus, greetings and questions about the time (Freshman French). But from there, it was downhill.

Spy and Q were frustrated by the hotel televisions. Darn it, only the “baby” shows (think PBS) were in English. Did that deter them? Not at all. Which begs the question of the value of cartoons… (Er, Spy and Q have now found their favorite cartoons at home converted to Spanish. I have it on good authority that this will promote language fluency…. *cue the evil laugh*)

In Montreal, we visited the Montreal Science Centre and their debut of the Indiana Jones exhibit. Awesome exhibit. Catch it if you get the chance. They even had a digital ‘find-the-missing-pieces-of-your-artifact’ game that kept Spy and Q engaged, interested and busy.

We ran the Labyrinth or Labyrinthe du Hangar 16.  Very cool. Being impatient people, we opted to go with the first group available.

In French.

Oops.

So we started the maze not knowing anything and not being able to communicate well (if at all) with our fellow lab rats.

In the dark, we made our way through shredded tarps, bungee cords and bars. Up ladders and down tube slides. From up high, water guns were turned on us…

Spy was worried, tho’ eventually, 45 minutes later, we reached the end.

We also rode the Saute Moutons, a ride on a jet boat to play in the rapids of the St. Lawrence River. The website photos and video well-represent my experience. Water. Lots and lots of water crashing over us. Again and again and again.

Almost everyone enjoyed the trip.

Spy hates water in his face and so we helped him strap on goggles that we’d dragged along on our trip specifically for this part of the vacation (much to the amusement of the family in front of us).  After the first splash, Spy’s enthusiasm for this boat ride took a dive and, when a wave removed said goggles, he screamed to the captain, “Go back NOW!”

Alas, his screams were to no avail. Spy quickly learned to keep his mouth shut and clutch the bar tightly. Nothing was dry by the time we returned to shore.

Spy now considers that he has bragging rights. “We almost drowned on that awful boat ride!”

The next day we headed to Quebec City where we put Q in jail. But when the guide turned off the light, he bolted.

Solitary confinement for 30 days was a frequent punishment (followed by the pillory and a branding). It was also here that they held serial murderers. However, for children under the age of 14, no matter the crime, there was no jail time. Just punishment. For example, ages 7-14 could spend time in the pillory for crimes.

The rest of our time was spent wandering and touring Upper Quebec, Vieux Quebec, and Lower Quebec. Spy grumbled loudly and continuously every time he was forced to climb yet another hill. Overall, ’twas the battlements that most impressed Spy and Q.

Well, no. That would be a lie. What most impressed Spy and Q was the hotel pool. That and the fact that in Canada, you only had to be 7 to go in the hot tub.

The beginning of this year’s family vacation was all about factory tours in Vermont.

Stop 1: The Granite Factory

Rock of Ages

Spy and Q sandblasted their very own granite samples (a puppy and a wolf respectively). Then, we toured the enormous granite factory. You’re seeing about half the place here. It was very loud. What were they working on? Mostly gravestones.

Stop 2: Ben and Jerry’s

That’s right, we waited for 1.5 hours to take a 10 minute tour. Sigh.  Spymom and Spydad knew there was no getting out of this one. Pictures? Sorry. We weren’t allowed.

BUT Spy did run up to this booth and ask a question.

Spymom envisioned the encounter going something like this:

Spy: “Can I ask a question?”

B&J Guy: “Sure, kid. That’ll be $2.75.”

Stop 3: The Chocolate Factory

Lake Champlain Chocolates

Spy and Q paid rapt attention. Particularly when they were handing out free samples.

This is the ‘Enrober’.

Which begs the question, can you disrobe chocolate? If so, there was a lot of disrobing going on in the factory store and outside in the parking lot…

Stop 4: The Teddy Bear Factory

Vermont Teddy Bear Company

By the time we reached this building, I was in complete sympathy with this bear:

But this place cracked me up. The tour was amazing, even if we could barely bear the bear puns.

We met Franken Bear who kindly demonstrated the inner workings of a Teddy Bear.

Unfortunately, they did not sell this bear in the gift shop.

Sigh.

How perfect he would have been for a certain Halloween party…

Spy asked the tour lady a question, “Did the stuffing machine ever go crazy and shoot stuffing all over the place and…”

“Why, yes!” she replied, and lifted a giant, over-sized stuffed bear arm from a pile of fluff. “This is an example of what can go wrong. We place them in this bin (of stuffing) to give them time to shrink back down to size.”

Spy grew quiet, considering whether to believe her or not.

*Snort* Spy obviously hadn’t been the first to ask.

And then there was the bear in the hospital. Aside from his ankle, he was suffering from low blood sugar. Hence the honey drip.

Stop 5: The Beer Factory

Magic Hat Brewing Company

The coolest of them all in terms of machinery. The Licker Sticker malfunctioned while we were there, and Spy and Q were thrilled to watch them get everything running again.

And even better? The free samples at the end. By this time, we’d had it. Even Spy was ready for a refreshing drink. He kept the bartender hopping. ***

*** A lady witnessed this moment and I heard her gasp, “That kid, is he really…”

“Water,” Spymom replied. “It’s just water.”